Feeling lost, lonely, afraid?
3 insights from an expert
Hello, sweet pea 💗
I know. It sucks. No one wants to feel lost, lonely and afraid.
But here we are.
That’s the bad news.
The good news is this is your starting point. This is the beginning of your new beginning.
3 things to know
In the early 1900s, Harry Houdini was an international escape artist. A handsome, fearless entertainer, Houdini dazzled crowds by being bound in heavy chains, arms and legs secured by padlocks, then he’d climb into a wooden crate, iron cage or riveted boiler. Locked inside, Houdini would be tossed into the sea to face certain death.
Suddenly Houdini would emerge from his watery tomb! A free man!
The escapologist had done it again!
But how?
Houdini had three secrets that can work for you too.
First, Houdini relaxed. Once submerged in the deep and fully bound, Houdini relaxed his whole body. He did not thrash against the locks and chains. Instead, he calmed down, conserved his energy and focused his attention on the intense task of sensing how to proceed — which muscles to loosen, when to wriggle, how to shift his body — in order to escape confinement.
Houdini’s first step was a masterful version of “Do the opposite” aka Calm the fuck down that we talked about last post.
Yes, you are in a shit-storm. Yes, it feels shitty. Yes, it sucks.
But thrashing, gnashing your teeth, wailing to everyone about it is cathartic, but it doesn’t get you out. It uses up your precious energy and diverts your focus from what needs to be done. Like Houdini, when you really want to escape, it’s time to calm the fuck down and focus on escaping, exiting your confinement.
Thrashing also dumbs you down when you need to be at your smartest. We’re going to talk about the brain science behind that in a future post, but for now, let’s leave it at relaxing helps you keep your wits about you.
You need your wits.
Second, Houdini realized escape is a process. There’s no magic bullet. If you really want to get out of your mess, it’s going to require your attention, focus and time to loosen the bindings, one by one. You can’t swim out of the cage when you’re still tied in knots.
Part of escaping is undoing the “stuff” — the chains, padlocks, iron cages — that are weighing you down and creating your confinement (that cappa thing). Old beliefs, old patterns, old voices in your head.
Yeah, that stuff.
That old stuff is like a maze in your mind. Escaping the familiar grooves and contours of those old routines requires delicate, gentle, slow movements and changes in perspective in order to loosen them and let go.
Third, Houdini recognized that relief comes from inner, not outer, resources. Some people claimed that Houdini escaped by bribing secret accomplices to set him free. To refute that claim, Houdini started performing his daring escapes in full view of his audiences. Suspended from a building or a tall crane, dangling in midair, Houdini would hang upside down, bound in a straightjacket and his hands in chains. As his spectators watched from below, The Handcuff King wriggled free.
Like Houdini, you have to wriggle out of your own chains. No one can do it for you. You can’t secretly bribe your way out. I know, that sucks. Who doesn’t want to offload the hard work onto someone else and take the easy way out?
But this is your work.
» It’s the gift of the shit-storm 💗
This is your chance to do your internal work: to tune in, feel your way through the darkness, sensing, perceiving and ultimately liberating yourself.
Escape, not ease
But this is where the road ahead starts to get steep. A bit challenging.
Remember the Sufi stream trying to cross the desert and the encouraging words of mystical poet Rumi….
I know you’re tired, but come this is the way.
— Rumi
Of course, you’re tired.
Shit-storms are tiring.
This is not easy.
I suspect this is where a lot of people will bail and that’s OK. No worries. All good.
This path isn’t for everyone. It’s not for tourists and day trippers. This life-line is a bit of a haul. (Sorry.) If it doesn’t feel right, that’s good to know. Pay attention to your internal clues. People are different. Messes are different. There are a billion paths. Just find the one that works for you.
Your freedom is worth it.
Power comes your way
Fortunately, the way forward is hard but it’s not all grunt work.
Soon we’re going to talk about the power of recognizing “what is.” That is, when you pull a Houdini and start relaxing, realizing and recognizing the truth of your situation, you can actually tap into a kind of energy that comes along to help uplift and support you on this path.
But for now, let’s just be grateful to The Handcuff King for sharing his wisdom of escapology with us.
Enjoy, sweet pea 💗
Anne
Though your destination is not yet clear
You can trust the promise of this opening;
Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning
That is at one with your life’s desire.
— John O’Donohue
**** The history of Houdini is a lifetime of death-defying feats and international fame as The Master Mystery. I have interpreted Houdini’s life story and distilled his wild tales of escape into the three secrets I have shared here.
Says who?
A mentor once described me as a “woman of depth” and I think that’s accurate. I love diving deep and sharing treasure.
Author of two New York Times bestsellers, Editor of Prevention (twice), Editorial Director of National Geographic, Content Director for Mindful
Single-mother of three beloveds 💗💗💗 who are now adulting-ish
Interfaith minister - open, curious, with respect for all
Traveler - always and everywhere
